“NO” is one of the most powerful words of freedom you can use.
Does this sound familiar to you?
“Hey Marla, we are going to Alice’s party Saturday night. Do you want to come with us?” I stand in silence as I read the text because one side of me is saying: “Heck yeah, I want to go. Alice is great, and I loving hanging with her, plus she does SO much for me I would feel guilty for not attending her party. However, the other side of me says, “Marla, you planned a night of relaxing and watching Netflix.”
I believe we sometimes get caught up trying to, “people please.” It is ok to want to be superwoman and save the day; however, you can’t attend everything you are invited, to especially not to please someone else. Sometimes you are going to have to say NO, and it can a liberating experience.
This is something I had to learn, and I am still perfecting my craft.
Check out these 5 reasons why I learned to say NO:
1. You are too tired and know you will not be able to put your 100% into the request. Do not give people half of yourself; just say no when you know you cannot be fully present.
2. You simply do not have the time to commit. I believe we make time for what we want; therefore, choose wisely. We all have 24 hours in a day. Time cannot be managed. We can only manage ourselves.
3. Ask yourself what area in your life you will neglect by doing the task or attending the event? By asking myself this question I am able to clear my schedule quickly and do what matters the most. See 5 ways to be more Selfish.
4. You have simply lost interest in the person or task. If you think about it, you don’t owe anyone an explanation. I am not implying to be rude to anyone; however, no one wants to deal with someone who is “tolerating” them. So, don’t tolerate; just say no. If the book is boring, put it down. If you do not like the restaurant, stop going. YOU ARE IN CONTROL. Why force yourself to do something when you have lost interest?
5. Peace. Saying no and loving yourself brings peace. Nothing can surpass having peace. Do WHATEVER it takes to create peace in your life.
Remember if you are tired, have lost interest, or simply don’t want to attend an event, it is okay. Saying no is not a bad thing; it just means you are saying yes to yourself. That is a great win for you!
Who are you going to say no to this year to make room for yourself?
Keep winning and creating harmony in your life.
Marla J. Albertie
Your Life Harmonizing Strategist
It’s taken me a long time not feeling guilty saying “no” personally and professionally. If you have too much on your plate, you have to speak up. We create unnecessary stress saying yes all the time and at the end not delivering what was expected.
Yes. It takes time to realize we are causing our own stress. We create our schedule and lives and it is okay to say no. Thank you for commenting!
The more you say “no”, the easier it gets. Great article Marla!
Yes this is SO true. I am glad you enjoyed the article. Thank you for responding.
Every time I say “no” to someone else, I realize i was saying “yes” to me. It’s been quite a freeing experience. These 5 points are awesome. I recently did #4, with someone I usually NEVER said “no” to. There were no hard feelings from them and I felt no guilt.
Exactly! Simply there is an mutual agreement that both parties are adults and their should not be any hard feelings. I love that you are taking time out for you and loving yourself! Saying “no” is peaceful.