No one is happy all the time, not even me. I have my days, however, for the most part, happiness is something I work on with intention and daily. So it is safe to say happiness is a choice and comes from within, even though outside factors can add to your happiness.
It’s not always easy to find happiness. As I mentioned, attempt to seek what brings you joy. Happiness isn’t about doing the right things only. Happiness is also about not doing the wrong things. The “wrong things” is subjective.
You might not even realize the things you’re doing to sabotage your chances for happiness.
I am learning to avoid these things that can sabotage my happiness:
Complaining. Complaining to yourself and others will not get you anywhere. It wastes your time and puts your mind into a negative state. How is that helpful?
If you can resolve the issue, there’s no reason to complain about the issue, simply solve it.
If you can’t resolve the issue, why waste your time and energy complaining about the issue?
Sometimes we complain to hear ourselves talk. I get it. We all need to vent. After you are done venting, carry on.
A question I always ask myself is “How is this serving me?”
Unrealistic goals. Your mother told you you could be anything. Well, technically she was correct. However, becoming what you want to be in life is solely up to you.
People who want to become an astronaut know that early in life, and they do the research to become an astronaut. So why would you set a goal to be an astronaut at age 50? This is what I mean by setting unrealistic goals.
Do yourself a favor and set reasonable goals you can achieve in the next 2-3 months. You can then set a more challenging goal afterward.
Perfection. You’ll never do anything “perfectly.” Seeking perfection will drive you insane because you will never find a stopping point. Set your sights on consistent improvement instead. Progress is progress.
Comfort. If you need to be comfortable all the time, you’ll never be happy. To seek fresh challenges and thrills in life, you will need to step outside of your comfort box. You will never know how awesome you are at something until you try.
Growth occurs during times of discomfort. Personal growth is an important part of happiness, it will amaze you at what you can accomplish once you step outside your box.
The need to impress others. We spend far too much time worrying about what others think about our clothes, car, job, and so on.
Why is this? Again, how is this serving you?
Worrying about something you can’t control is a recipe for an emotional disaster. I have a news flash, no one cares about what you have. If they are jealous, that is not your problem.
Negative self-talk. If you had someone in your life that insulted, doubted, and undermined you all day long, what type of impact will that have on you? You would not like it at all, so why do we talk negatively to ourselves?
Monitor how you talk to yourself, after a while your mind, body, and soul will react to the words you are saying and you may not like the results.
Negative people. The quality of people in your life affects your happiness.
Seek positive people that support you and allow you to be yourself. At the very least, only include people in your life that don’t sabotage you or make you unhappy. You know you have at least one right now. Think about it…
Resistance to change. Life is full of change. To make progress, it’s important to try new hobbies or take a chance at a new job.
If you are not open to change how can you discover growth? Change is coming whether or not you want it, so you might as well embrace it. Your kids will move away. A friend will pass away. You’ll grow old.
Change is one of the few constants in life. Embrace it and always look for the positives.
Are you doing any of these? If so, it’s possible you’re sabotaging your chances for happiness. Instead of looking to do more, perhaps you should do fewer of these negative things.
How happy are you? Avoid these eight things for a month and monitor your thoughts, I can almost guarantee you will feel happier.
Write me and let me know how you are doing